sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
