We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
