i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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