Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
