I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
