a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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