I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
