elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
