But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
