You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
its liver damage thursday
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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