I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
