I want to make a zoo with you.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
