Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Randomize
