its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
so much tequila, so little girl.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
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