So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize