I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize