You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
