her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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