hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize