how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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