dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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