we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
