It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
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This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
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So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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