You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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