fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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