whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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