i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize