therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize