check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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