Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize