That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
