So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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