doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
