hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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