and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
