I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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