P.S. I can't hear my feet
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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