i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
