he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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