If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
