Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Houston, we have a squirter
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
