Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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