So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
