Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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