So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like death gave me a hand job
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize