I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
