Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(417): View more from Missouri

Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?

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(417): Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional? http://tfl.nu/5yvr

Replies (7) Good night (1838) Bad night (731)
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(916): View more from California

I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.

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(916): I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time. http://tfl.nu/hsnu

Replies (14) Good night (4239) Bad night (639)
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(812): View more from Indiana

The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?

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(812): The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean? http://tfl.nu/84o9

Replies (105) Good night (19222) Bad night (1810)
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(518): View more from New York

you're out of your mind

(518): View more from New York

you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear

(518): View more from New York

it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence

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(518): you're out of your mind (518): you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear (518): it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence http://tfl.nu/wmaw

Replies (11) Good night (842) Bad night (2247)
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(941): View more from Florida

i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that

(850): View more from Florida

im pretty sure thats an 11

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(941): i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that (850): im pretty sure thats an 11 http://tfl.nu/g2lw

Replies (23) Good night (4263) Bad night (1274)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car

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(973): Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car http://tfl.nu/9e8r

Replies (38) Good night (9144) Bad night (2084)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.

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(773): Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices. http://tfl.nu/v05l

Replies (8) Good night (2827) Bad night (1039)
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(360): View more from Washington

I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.

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(360): I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back. http://tfl.nu/kpg0

Replies (21) Good night (11590) Bad night (1070)
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(707): View more from California

I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA

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(707): I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA http://tfl.nu/ppt3

Replies (24) Good night (3178) Bad night (1468)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.

(847): View more from Illinois

Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.

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(262): I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state. (847): Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it. http://tfl.nu/q5kp

Replies (7) Good night (948) Bad night (2300)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.

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(484): he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended. http://tfl.nu/6aj3

Replies (2) Good night (722) Bad night (1270)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.

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(304): The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke. http://tfl.nu/dnme

Replies (9) Good night (2156) Bad night (542)
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(916): View more from California

Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b

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(916): Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b http://tfl.nu/9ccv

Replies (5) Good night (994) Bad night (493)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.

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(336): Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them. http://tfl.nu/8xwy

Replies (2) Good night (774) Bad night (310)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.

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(847): I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B. http://tfl.nu/1rlu

Replies (8) Good night (605) Bad night (664)

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