I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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