Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
