she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
