she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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